In my early twenties, I experienced a terrifying anxiety attack—one that would leave a lasting impact on how I viewed fear, health, and the power of the mind.
This was when the discussion about Aids was constantly in the media. I became consumed with the fear that someone in my past relationship may have had such ailments. I had already taken a physical and blood test and received a negative result, yet the lingering fear of “What if?” refused to let me rest. My mind spiraled with irrational thoughts and worst-case scenarios.
Out of fear, I delayed collecting a follow-up test result. Weeks turned into months. I was trapped in a mental prison of fear, convinced I was dying. I began to physically manifest symptoms associated with illness—sweats, fatigue, and constant worry. The anxiety was so intense that I even wrote a letter to my parents, preparing them for my death. It was one of the darkest times in my life.
At that time, I didn’t know what I was experiencing was called an anxiety or panic attack. I just knew I was going through sleepless nights and really in physical pain. Living alone in the U.S., away from my family, only deepened my isolation and depression. I desperately wanted peace, sleep, and a way out of the torment in my mind.
One sleepless night, I stumbled upon a late-night infomercial. A doctor in Chicago was holding a seminar on mental health. Something compelled me to write down the address and attend. That seminar changed everything.
For the first time, I heard someone explain how our thoughts affect our feelings and actions. The doctor spoke about how we can interrupt and reframe anxious thinking to regain control of our mental state. That was my light bulb moment. I realized that my anxiety wasn’t caused by reality, but by my perception of getting something contagious.
Every time the thought “what if something is wrong” came to mind, I started consciously choosing a new thought—something calming, reassuring, and life-affirming. It didn’t happen overnight, but gradually, the grip of fear began to loosen.
Eventually, I found the courage to go back to the clinic and check my test results. They were negative, just as they had been before. I felt relieved—but the mind wasn’t done yet. It whispered, “What if the test was wrong?” This time, I knew better. I dismissed the thought and stood firm in the truth: I am okay; nothing is wrong in me or with me.
That’s how I began healing from my anxiety and panic attacks—by understanding that my thoughts were the root of my fear. Once I changed how I thought, I changed how I felt.
Understanding Panic and Anxiety Attacks
What is a panic attack?
A panic attack is a sudden and intense episode of fear or discomfort that peaks within minutes. It may include symptoms like heart palpitations, shortness of breath, sweating, trembling, chest pain, nausea, dizziness, and a fear of dying or losing control.
What is an anxiety attack?
While not a clinical term, “anxiety attack” is often used to describe a build-up of anxiety symptoms that may or may not lead to a panic attack. Anxiety is typically more prolonged and tied to worry or fear about real or imagined future events.
What causes panic or anxiety attacks?
They are usually triggered by:
- Stress or trauma
- Fear of illness or death
- Negative thought patterns
- Biological sensitivity (genetics, brain chemistry)
- Isolation or lack of support
How can you overcome panic or anxiety attacks?
- Recognize the attack – Understand that what you’re feeling is temporary and not life-threatening.
- Challenge your thoughts – Notice fearful thinking and replace it with calming, rational thoughts.
- Breathe deeply – Slow, deep breathing helps regulate your nervous system.
- Ground yourself – Focus on your senses and surroundings to stay present.
- Seek support – Talk to a therapist or join a support group.
- Educate yourself – Learn how your mind works so you can better manage its patterns.
A Message to Anyone Struggling
If you’re currently facing an anxiety or panic attack, know this: You are not alone, and you are not broken. Your mind is responding to fear, and the key to freedom lies in how you respond to those thoughts.
I’m now working on putting together a short course on understanding and managing panic and anxiety attacks—based not just on research, but lived experience. If I could climb out of that anxiety/panic attack mental prison, so can you.
Your mind is powerful, but you are more powerful than your thoughts.
Written by Bess JT
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